I have come to understand, just how many people make excuses for people who intentionally abuse others. Excuses are made, the abuse is minimized, the affects of the abuse are ignored. And a whole range of cognitive distortions, applied.
I think counsellors who deal with abusers – minimize the abuse and harm caused to their victims, to make their jobs easier to deal with. They justify it as ‘compassion’, but it isn’t. Anything that is a lie, is not compassion. And where minimizing, excusing, justifying, trivialising, blaming the victim in some way etc happens, there is no honesty and there is NO compassion or empathy being shown to the victim.
And worse, it shames the victim. And that is more abuse.
This has happened again – and I am so over it.
I have ZERO trust in people who do this.
It’s happened far too often in my life and I refuse to let it happen anymore.