Healing From Complex Trauma & PTSD/CPTSD

A journey to healing from complex trauma.

It makes me wonder, why people defend paedophiles.


My counsellor has an ongoing issues with having to express her opinion about abusers. Including paedophiles. She likes to think of them, as not that bad really.

This leads to me being constantly triggered and hurt by what feels like minimization of the abuse, and defending the abusers as ‘bad people who can do good’.

Quite frankly, I don’t give a fuck if they can ‘do good’. I care only about all the horrific abuse they believe is absolutely okay to make children suffer. If they ‘do good’ (or more appropriately termed ‘normal’) – it does not in any way make them a good person, whilst also sexually abusing children and destroying their childhoods. Nothing good they can do, will make up for the abhorrent behaviours they choose. Nothing they can do, changes the fact that they are disgusting, vile people.

This ongoing need to voice her opinions, led to me (I was already in a highly emotional state), being triggered massively, when she stated ‘paedophiles can love their own children’.

(My view on that is that is BS. And paedophiles aren’t capable of viewing children appropriately and should NEVER be allowed to have children in their care, including their own. Anyone who believes differently, is enabling paedophiles to access children and carry out their vile, abhorrent, evil desires.)

It was like throwing a grenade at me, and watching it explode. I nearly didn’t make it home alive. It was a highly inappropriate and potentially dangerous statement to make, when I am already having suicide ideation.

I’ve come to realise, her need to voice her opinions, may be personal. Maybe a relative of hers, is a paedophile. Maybe, she ‘has ‘to believe they are capable of good and loving their own children, because this is a very personal issue to her, she needs to believe.

People believe the most bizarre things, to cope.

And the fact that she felt it necessary to vent her opinion, when anyone with any empathy/trauma understanding, would absolutely know not to… is suspicious to me. It’s a red flag to me. It is quite bizarre and always know that is never something good.

Maybe her own father, or brother or someone is a paedophile. It would explain her need to voice her opinions, as being more important than my emotional wellbeing and safety.

I think I challenge her own views and beliefs, and as with most people challenged about beliefs they hold onto tightly for personal reasons…. she doesn’t like it.

There are usually personal reasons why people believe what they think they need to believe.


Author: Healing From Complex Trauma & PTSD/CPTSD

I am a survivor of complex and multiple trauma and abuse, who at the age of 40, began my healing journey. I am using my journey to recovery and healing, to help others, to help survivors feel less alone, validated, encouraged and to enable others to understand themselves more. Complex trauma, particularly from severe, prolonged childhood abuse, is profoundly life changing. Complex trauma produces complex adults. The journey to recovery is a painful, often lonely, emotional daily challenge and it is my aim to encourage others in their daily battle.

2 thoughts on “It makes me wonder, why people defend paedophiles.

  1. Brilliant Brillant post!!!!!
    Helps me SO much to understand.

  2. Lilly, you are saving lives.
    Brillant post.

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