Healing From Complex Trauma & PTSD/CPTSD

A journey to healing from complex trauma.

Avoiding ignorance, lack of empathy/insight = Self Care


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This is something I have learned the hard way.

People’s ‘opinions’ and ‘advice’ are often wrong, harmful and shame complex trauma survivors.

I learned to have better emotional boundaries, as a result of being re-traumatised, shamed and hurt, by people who know little about trauma, yet consider themselves to have a valid opinion.

I’ve learned most people in fact, have little insight into complex trauma and little empathy.

Self care, self compassion and boundaries, are vital to healing and general wellbeing.



Author: Healing From Complex Trauma & PTSD/CPTSD

I am a survivor of complex and multiple trauma and abuse, who at the age of 40, began my healing journey. I am using my journey to recovery and healing, to help others, to help survivors feel less alone, validated, encouraged and to enable others to understand themselves more. Complex trauma, particularly from severe, prolonged childhood abuse, is profoundly life changing. Complex trauma produces complex adults. The journey to recovery is a painful, often lonely, emotional daily challenge and it is my aim to encourage others in their daily battle. ~ Lilly Hope Lucario

5 thoughts on “Avoiding ignorance, lack of empathy/insight = Self Care

  1. This post is so helpful because I’m dealing with this exact thing with my brother & sister. I’m the family Scapegoat so when I speak my truth about my child abuse & rape I’m punished with Silent Treatment etc etc.

    So my options are to go No Contact or try & stand up for myself which is the same as beating my head against a wall. Their wall of denial. Going No Contact won’t be that difficult at this point. I’m done. I’m ready.

    What I’m really struggling with is my RAGE!!!! RAGE from decades of being told to shut up.

    Thank Heaven above for this blog!!

    • I’m very understanding of being the family scapegoat and it is abuse in itself. I think having strong boundaries to protect yourself from the toxicity of abusive family members, is vital to healing and general wellbeing.

      I am also struggling atm, with anger issues. I have suppressed needed anger, for decades and I am not good at expressing it verbally. I have that deep down shame…. that inner critic voice that tells me this is bad to feel angry etc. When I do actually know, it is not wrong to feel anger.

      It’s a tough journey and we need self compassion in buckets.

  2. Best read. Better than any therapist !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  3. So true! When I was first struggling with PTSD and depression I didn’t realize how completely ignorant most people are and, partly because I didn’t know enough about PTSD myself, and partly from low self-esteem, I gave the idiotic opinions of others far too much importance. Which of course just added to the trauma and low self-esteem. Thank goodness for my supportive parents and wonderful therapists and psychiatrists who helped set me straight!