Healing From Complex Trauma & PTSD/CPTSD

A journey to healing from complex trauma.

‘Natural Resilience To Major Life Stressors, Not So Common’



Complex trauma, which is ongoing severe abuse, within a captivity situation, is one of the biggest life stressors, anyone can endure.

Yet, society demands that abuse and child abuse survivors, just ‘get over it’ and deem them to be weak, if they are not being ‘strong warrior survivors’. And throw out shaming statements like ‘don’t be a victim’. All shaming attitudes.

It has never made sense to me, that anyone who has endured some of the worst life experiences, are supposed to be ‘stronger’ than people who have not endured such impacting suffering.

It’s just another way to shame abuse survivors. And that is really wrong.

I am glad to see research that shows that natural resilience to major trauma, is not common. It takes pressure off survivors of severe abuse and complex trauma, to live up to society’s inappropriate demands.

Compassion and empathy, are vital when considering how complex trauma survivors are coping.


Please don’t shame survivors, who are not coping in a way deemed to be ‘strong’. It is cruel, harmful and can lead to suicide.

And if you are someone, who feels they are not coping well……… please know I will not shame you for this. I know you have already endured so much and how you are managing, is okay by me.

If you are struggling to get through the day, feeling suicidal, feeling like no-one cares and no-one understands……. please know I do understand, I do have empathy and I am not going to put cruel and inappropriate demands on you.

And please, know you deserve compassion, patience, empathy and love. And nothing less than that.


All blogs written by Lilly Hope Lucario and subject to © Copyright Protected.

All rights reserved. No part of any entry/blog, may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any means, including photocopying, recording, or other electronic or mechanical methods, without the name of the author – Lilly Hope Lucario and a clear link back to this blog –  https://healingfromcomplextraumaandptsd.wordpress.com/

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Author: Healing From Complex Trauma & PTSD/CPTSD

I am a survivor of complex and multiple trauma and abuse, who at the age of 40, began my healing journey. I am using my journey to recovery and healing, to help others, to help survivors feel less alone, validated, encouraged and to enable others to understand themselves more. Complex trauma, particularly from severe, prolonged childhood abuse, is profoundly life changing. Complex trauma produces complex adults. The journey to recovery is a painful, often lonely, emotional daily challenge and it is my aim to encourage others in their daily battle.

3 thoughts on “‘Natural Resilience To Major Life Stressors, Not So Common’

  1. Thankyou so much for your empathy, it means a great deal as I live in a state and community that is very shaming to folks with mental health issues and downright punitive and abusive.

  2. Thank you. I really needed to hear that today

  3. I am so glad this post has helped. Real empathy for others and the journey they are in, is not common. I don’t put any inappropriate expectations on anyone, for how they are coping.

    I am glad there is research that shows, resilience to major stressors is not so common, and how this will affect complex trauma survivors.

    Empathy, no judgment, no expectations, just compassion – are what is needed.

    Much love, Lilly ❤❤❤

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