Healing From Complex Trauma & PTSD/CPTSD

A journey to healing from complex trauma.

Breaking A Child’s Spirit – Is Not Of Jesus


It bothers me greatly, how too many churches and church people, are deluded to believe hurting children and ‘breaking their spirit’ – is love, or needed, or healthy, or Jesus like.

I’ve seen a toxic, unhealthy, spiritually abusive church in action. I was abused there, and know I am not alone in this.

The ‘in-house’ parenting courses, run by elders and authorised by the abusive ministers, encourage parents to hit their children, from being babies onwards….. increasing in harshness and pain level – to belting older children and teenagers.

Sadly, this is all too common in right wing, conservative type churches.

I discussed this at length today in counselling, after hearing of more abusive practises, that sadly don’t surprise me, but disgust me.

These toxic people, choose to starve their children for more than 24 hours, to ‘break their spirit’. It was confirmed in counselling, this is 100% child abuse. As is the belting and hitting children.

These abusive practises, also combine with women being subservient to their husbands. I’ve heard these people state beliefs, like a woman should always offer herself every day, for sex. Or she is failing as a wife. Women are encouraged not to work and to do all their husbands demand. They are required to ask permission to spend money and many other subservient attitudes.

Interestingly, these people, used the toxic resources of the now disgraced Mark Driscoll, who resigned before he was sacked…. for abuse, plagiarism, trolling social media under a fake name and more.  His attitudes are abusive…. so this church I once attended, loved these abusive resources, promoted by an abusive pastor.

They also believe all those not Baptised, not following these abusive beliefs, are going to be thrown by God into a big pit of fire, to burn for eternity. More Bible verses, they choose not to know the real interpretation and context of.

God is not the abusive, narcissistic psychopath – they portray him as. But, they choose to see God as that…….. so they can act like narcissistic psychopaths, themselves.

It paints a very dark, gruesome picture of abuse, on many levels.

And I have had all of this confirmed as abuse, by other wise Christian people

My heart breaks for all the children affected by these toxic, abusive people. To know they are continually in fear and being harmed and told this is ‘love’ is horrendous. To know the long term physical, mental and emotional consequences of this, is so upsetting.

If I had proof of any of this, I would report them to child services, for child abuse. But, I don’t have proof. Although, the more that come forward, the evidence there is.

Anyone who believes causing children pain, starving children – is love, is a very sick, twisted person.

And the very fact, they protect themselves and don’t allow certain (intuitive) people with emotional intelligence (like me) ….. into their cult like inner circle and inner abusive practices ………. is proof that they actually know what they are doing, is wrong.

So this is not a case of they don’t know it is abuse….. they do. Because they hide it, keep it hidden beneath their layers of inner circle protection.

None of this is of Jesus.

They worship a fake Jesus.

They worship an idol.

They worship Satan.

No-one who is in relationship, with Jesus…….. will believe child abuse is of Jesus.

Jesus would never say love is inflicting pain and suffering, on a child.

That is not love. No matter how many twisted Bible verses, taken out of context, they wish to delude themselves with.

Abuse of any kind…….. is never of Jesus.

It is of darkness.

The only good in this, is I know other people are themselves, working out these people are abusive and getting out of the church. Thank God.

~ Lilly Hope Lucario

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Author: Healing From Complex Trauma & PTSD/CPTSD

I am a survivor of complex and multiple trauma and abuse, who at the age of 40, began my healing journey. I am using my journey to recovery and healing, to help others, to help survivors feel less alone, validated, encouraged and to enable others to understand themselves more. Complex trauma, particularly from severe, prolonged childhood abuse, is profoundly life changing. Complex trauma produces complex adults. The journey to recovery is a painful, often lonely, emotional daily challenge and it is my aim to encourage others in their daily battle.

4 thoughts on “Breaking A Child’s Spirit – Is Not Of Jesus

  1. Such deep truth! So well said! My parents believed in beating the will out of us. Thank you for sharing this!❤

    • I’m so sorry you endured this physical and spiritual abuse.

      No child should ever be hit. Yet, so many church people believe it is needed and good.

      I find it quite sick, that adults teach their children that hitting and hurting them = love.

      It’s not love. It’s abuse.

      • I believe this is why it was so hard for me and my siblings to speak the truth and live the truth and figure out our own lives because we lived in the shadow of the belt.😦 Thanks for your great blog full of resources!

      • Children often live in a continual state of fear, when they are living with the threat of being hit, belted etc.

        This is very damaging to the child’s growing brain and psyche.

        I’m sorry you were subjected to this abuse. No child should ever endure this.

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