Healing From Complex Trauma & PTSD/CPTSD

A journey to healing from complex trauma.

When narcissists delude themselves into believing they are INFJ’s.


INFJ – is one of the personality types in the Myers Briggs Personality tests, which are based upon the work of Carl Jung.

I am an INFJ. I have a strong sense of justice, intuition, right and wrong, a capacity for empathy and motivation matters to me. These strengths, are usually far more developed in INFJ’s, than average.

I read an article the other day, how when narcissistic people take these tests, their delusion based answers, can give them a result of being an INFJ.

‘Sensitivity’ is something that is often confused and plays into this delusion. Being oversensitive to criticism, and always reacting badly and immaturely, is narcissism. Whereas, being aware and sensitive of the needs and emotions of others, is empathic sensitivity. There is a huge difference between these. The former, is all about self and self serving. The latter is about others, and others centred.

A popular INFJ page, has posts which are more narcissistic based motivations, than empathy based motivations. They include hurting others, and a sense of entitlement to do that, with no conscience and no remorse.

The posts are often ‘me me me’ based. With little thought as to the effect of this on others. Doesn’t sound empathic to me. Sounds narcissistic to me.

Having considered the posts and the reaction to one post – where I disagreed – it became clear – the admin and other commenters, were in fact narcissistic in their attitudes and responses. They justified their harmful behaviours. Classic narcissism.

This page even describes the page as ‘the biggest INFJ page’, in the first sentence of it’s description. Ego, boasting, ‘size orientated’ – all sound narcissistic to me.

I read this article below, and it validates my insight into this. And why some people who claim to be INFJ’s are in fact narcissistic. Just the quiet, covert type of narcissists. Not the grandiose, extrovert type.

So, I no longer follow that INFJ page. Because they lack insight and honesty. And encourage harmful behaviours. Narcissists often fail to have self insight and have a sense of entitlement to harm. It’s always a huge red flag to me.

And I don’t involve myself in that.

~ Lilly Hope Lucario


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Author: Healing From Complex Trauma & PTSD/CPTSD

I am a survivor of complex and multiple trauma and abuse, who at the age of 40, began my healing journey. I am using my journey to recovery and healing, to help others, to help survivors feel less alone, validated, encouraged and to enable others to understand themselves more. Complex trauma, particularly from severe, prolonged childhood abuse, is profoundly life changing. Complex trauma produces complex adults. The journey to recovery is a painful, often lonely, emotional daily challenge and it is my aim to encourage others in their daily battle. ~ Lilly Hope Lucario

6 thoughts on “When narcissists delude themselves into believing they are INFJ’s.

  1. This was an interesting read! Thank you 🙂

  2. Thank you for this!!!! I love how you cut thru the crap in a no nonsence way!!!

  3. Are you saying that INFJs can’t be narcissists?

    • Yes, I am saying narcissists cannot be INFJ’s, due to the very traits of an INFJ being the opposite of narcissism.
      Narcissists, are not authentic, they are highly deceptive and dishonest.
      Narcissists do not want to make the world a better place, or help others, they do everything for and about themselves.

      This is an INFJ portrait.

      INFJs are creative nurturers with a strong sense of personal integrity and a drive to help others realize their potential. Creative and dedicated, they have a talent for helping others with original solutions to their personal challenges.

      What Makes the INFJ Tick

      INFJs are guided by a deeply considered set of personal values. They are intensely idealistic, and can clearly imagine a happier and more perfect future. They can become discouraged by the harsh realities of the present, but they are typically motivated and persistent in taking positive action nonetheless. The INFJ feels an intrinsic drive to do what they can to make the world a better place.

      INFJs want a meaningful life and deep connections with other people. They do not tend to share themselves freely but appreciate emotional intimacy with a select, committed few. Although their rich inner life can sometimes make them seem mysterious or private to others, they profoundly value authentic connections with people they trust.

  4. I love this! I am 100% INFJ. I had the classic INFJ epiphany when I found out my results. I love that you pointed out the difference between being sensitive like an INFJ and “always reacting badly and immaturely.” My sister-in-law claims to be an INFJ but she is a narcissist. She is nice to people to get something from them but most of the time her actions are designed to hurt people. No one is off limits to her. She has destroyed relationships in the family and shows no remorse. I have never been able to figure out why she is this way and gets the results of INFJ until I read this blog post. It all makes sense now. Thanks so much for sharing!

  5. I read that article too on psychology today about infj’s being covert narcissist. I thought the writer was making a lot of assumptions. Because of articles like the one on psychology today I have been seeing INFJ’s In forums wondering about the covert narcissist connection to this personality type.