Healing From Complex Trauma & PTSD/CPTSD

A journey to healing from complex trauma.


“You are a hero with a hero’s heart, to choose to survive and deal and still be a good hearted person”

I shared my blog about the most painful, yet most courageous, most brave thing I have ever done, was to accept the truth about my mother being complicit in all the abuse I endured including the child sexual abuse. And how this takes far more courage, than making excuses, which was far easier.

This was some lovely feedback I received….

“Absolutely! And you are a hero with a hero’s heart, to choose to survive and deal and still be a good hearted person.

Disillusionment is the most difficult emotion to face and get through, and so many choose not to, because it IS so incredibly painful to face and deal with all that it brings.

Enlightenment, waking up, wisdom, growth, is a very painful process because it’s facing our illusions and seeing the truth, it’s disillusioning, and it’s not an easy path. It’s a hero’s path.

Well done Lilly ❤ “

It is such lovely feedback and I will take some time to digest these words. As part of my believing good things about myself, and not dismissing them, as I have always done.

(This is the blog, the comment was in response to

https://healingfromcomplextraumaandptsd.wordpress.com/2016/10/13/the-most-painful-yet-bravest-thing-i-have-ever-done-lilly-hope-lucario/ )

~ Lilly Hope Lucario

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My teenage son “you are the most caring person, Mum”

I had a moment today, which almost reduced me to tears. We were sat eating dinner.

My teenage son (14), asked me how my day went. I explained I had a lovely time at my  ladies group. And how I am so happy to see some of the group members, have made friends with each other, and meet up outside of the group, along with their husbands. To which my son responded with “you are the most caring person, Mum”.

And he really meant it. He doesn’t say things like that unless he really means them. And he is pretty vocal about his views and opinions, because I allow him that safety of respectfully speaking his mind.

It meant a lot to me, that my sons see I am caring. Because modelling that to them, is important. I am aware my empathic and caring nature, has a great influence on them developing that in their personalities too.

When I set up my ladies group, I did it because there are lots of people who are lonely, for many different reasons. There are ladies who are new to the area/country, who are divorced and have lost their friends, who’s partners are not keen on socialising, who have been ill and lost friends in the process, who’s partners are deceased, who are taking care of relatives, escaping domestic violence. Many reasons.

To offer them a safe group, where they feel welcomed, where they can just chat over a coffee, matters. It matters to them. And I am so glad that I have been able to provide this. I’ve weeded out a few shitty people, which means the group is lovely. And going so well. And I enjoy their company too.

So, to see my teenage son, understand this is caring about people, matters. To know they see me, doing something that benefits others and not just myself, matters. Especially in this increasingly egocentric, selfish, narcissistic world we live in. Continue reading