I always know how I am doing when I am tested. Recently two issues came up, that even 6 months ago – would have reduced me to an emotional wreck.
And yet, I have remained calm, and focussed on what I need to do to stay that way.
Trust issues and people lying/misleading/manipulating me – are always triggers. Yet, now I have come to understand I don’t need to trust anyone, only myself. I’ve let go of any need to trust anyone else.
And I have come to the point of knowing, other people’s issues – are not my issues. I don’t need to internalise them. I can understand – that is their issues and I can see they are in no way, a reflection of me, or my worth.
I also assumed I would feel very emotional about a sociopath who has caused me trauma, via cyber abuse, threats, intimidation and stalking, going to jail. Yet, again, I was calm, thankful, yet not emotional.
I am definitely able to deal with my emotional reactions and triggers, far better atm.
I am also far better at self care, and taking my focus away from trauma related issues. Which I have no doubt has increased by emotional resilience. I’m okay at seeing this progress in my healing. And I am so aware, my healing and progress is taking exactly the right amount of time, for my unique journey and my unique needs.
Which is something I advise everyone to focus on. Their own journey and needs, and not what others are saying it should be, or how quick it should be.
~ Lilly Hope Lucario
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