I’ve not been having the best few weeks, with my counselling ending so badly, plus other issues in my life I have to endure for some time yet.
I have a ladies group I have been running now for a year and it going so well. At my last ladies group we had such a lovely time. It was our Christmas get-together, we had a secret Santa, and I brought decorations and decorated the table – which the ladies thought was lovely.
Today, was our last meet before Christmas, and the ladies were just delightful to be with. Some ladies have some personal issues and we talk about that. But, we also have chat about nice things too and have some giggles.
I really feel like I can be myself around the ladies. I joke a bit and they like that – it always makes them laugh. I can also be the kooky person I am, and they are accepting of that. They know I have had a ‘difficult’ childhood, but I haven’t elaborated on that. And I don’t intend to, because I can’t handle anymore hurt and rejection about my trauma history.
I am happy to just focus on other things about my life to talk about. They are very encouraging of my photography career and ask me questions and are interested. Which is nice because no-one has ever really been interested in what I do, other than to put me down.
So, it’s nice to have genuine encouragement and I am appreciative of that. I’m looking forward to catching up with them in the new year.
I’m also getting to know a new group of Mums at my sons school, one of which is also doing a photography course. These Mums seem mature and I am taking it slowly getting to know them. I’m inviting them round to have a swim in our pool and we’re arranging a trip to the beach. And my son has all these friends in his class next year, so those friendships between the children will flourish and between the Mums too.
All nice stuff to focus on and look forward to.
I am building the life I always deserved – nice people, friendships, a new career.
2017, will be a new start and a new focus.
Leaving some of the shit from this year – in the past, as New Year comes round.
~ Lilly Hope Lucario
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