Healing From Complex Trauma & PTSD/CPTSD

A journey to healing from complex trauma.

My mother died


I received an email from my sister today, letting me know our mother has died.

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Author: Healing From Complex Trauma & PTSD/CPTSD

I am a survivor of complex and multiple trauma and abuse, who at the age of 40, began my healing journey. I am using my journey to recovery and healing, to help others, to help survivors feel less alone, validated, encouraged and to enable others to understand themselves more. Complex trauma, particularly from severe, prolonged childhood abuse, is profoundly life changing. Complex trauma produces complex adults. The journey to recovery is a painful, often lonely, emotional daily challenge and it is my aim to encourage others in their daily battle. ~ Lilly Hope Lucario

10 thoughts on “My mother died

  1. God bless you as you cope with this news. I am also sorry your siblings have not been supportive of this blog.

  2. I sympathize with you in this complex complicated situation, as my own narcissistic mother passed last year. It was a very complicated feeling to explain but I still grieved as I had most of my life for a mother I never really had and that never loved me. Numb is a good way to put it. I had chose no contact about 10 months before her death and I had a premonition she would die while I was no contact but I decided that no contact was the only way out for me after years of abuse. I felt so much guilt and also relief that maybe I could finally have a normal relationship with my siblings after her death.It has been a roll a coaster or emotions and it took months to process and I still am at times. It has definitely been a work in progress and some things have changed but some relationships remain very damaged. I pray for you to find comfort and peace through this difficult situation.

  3. Lilly, I am so sorry to hear this. You have been through so much and it hurts to think of you in any more pain. Honor whatever you are feeling and take care of yourself…you deserve your own compassion for whatever it is you feel and whatever comes up. Sending love your way…We are here if you ever need it. Big hugs 💜❤️💜

  4. Oh Lilly, sending you lots of prayers and hugs and support!!

    Can’t even imagine how difficult this is.

    Just Breathe
    Self Compassion
    Self Care

  5. I’m punched right in the heart upon seeing this 😦
    I know how BEYOND hard it was and has been for me when my mom died in 2014.
    I’ve crawled out of my current apathetic hole (best friend died this week and I’ve been barely getting by as it is) to say take all the time you need!!!
    Know how many loving arms and thoughts are being wrapped around you at almost every moment. This a big turbulent wave to ride out but swim you must.

  6. Thank you all, I truly appreciate your messages.
    I am numb, I guess it’s shock, or dissociation.
    I know I would tell anyone else in this situation, to have lots of self care, self compassion and allow themselves to feel the grieving emotions, as they arise.
    So, I will try to take that advice, for myself.
    Lilly ❤ ❤

  7. That’s how I felt when my narc mother died.

  8. Lily, I am sending you strength. Please know that there are many many people who understand what you are about to deal with. I’m not usually one for platitudes but ‘ When the dust settles again you will see the road’.