Healing From Complex Trauma & PTSD/CPTSD

A journey to healing from complex trauma.

Three Weeks – And I’m Already Being Shamed About Grieving ‘Too Long’ ~ Lilly Hope Lucario




I just had a ‘friend’ tell me I should stop feeling sad and focus on what I have in my life that’s good – like she does.

Shaming attitude right there. And someone who considers themselves ‘better’ in the way they view life.

But, in fact, she is absolutely wrong. Because suppressing normal and needed human emotions – is what’s unhealthy.

And this ‘advice’ is when I only heard my mother died 3 weeks ago.

Yep…. 3 weeks.

Apparently 3 weeks is too long and I should be ‘over it’ by now and should be ‘focussing on the good’ and blah blah blah….

All this shows to me, is this person has zero insight into healthy grieving. Has zero empathy. Has zero capacity to think rationally. Has an entitled attitude to make someone already suffering – suffer some more. As shaming people like to do.


This is exactly the kind of unhealthy societal rhetoric, that encourages me all the more, to keep writing about unhealthy beliefs and why people need to stop.

~ Lilly Hope Lucario

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Author: Healing From Complex Trauma & PTSD/CPTSD

I am a survivor of complex and multiple trauma and abuse, who at the age of 40, began my healing journey. I am using my journey to recovery and healing, to help others, to help survivors feel less alone, validated, encouraged and to enable others to understand themselves more. Complex trauma, particularly from severe, prolonged childhood abuse, is profoundly life changing. Complex trauma produces complex adults. The journey to recovery is a painful, often lonely, emotional daily challenge and it is my aim to encourage others in their daily battle. ~ Lilly Hope Lucario

2 thoughts on “Three Weeks – And I’m Already Being Shamed About Grieving ‘Too Long’ ~ Lilly Hope Lucario

  1. Lilly. My mom died 20 years ago. I’m still grieving. Or maybe just finally grieving for what I thought I lost. For the mother I should have had instead of the mother I did have. For the childhood that wasn’t a childhood. Grieve in your own way and your own time. It’s your journey.

    • Thank you ❤ I am sorry you are grieving your mother and lost childhood and you did not have. I know how hard this all is. I feel like I have been grieving all my life. I think those of us who go through it, are sometimes the ones who have the greatest empathy for others.
      Lilly ❤