Now I don’t have to care if I say the ‘wrong thing’ in counselling, I am free to call the abuse what it was – evil.
And the abuser – evil.
And a narcissist. Or sociopath. Or psychopath. Or paedophile. Or sex offender. Or whatever else I want to call them.
There is a greater level of freedom, when you don’t feel like you have to please your counsellor, who always minimized and invalidated everything I endured. And always made me feel like a bad person, for talking about abusers in a ‘bad’ way.
Now I can say anything I want and not risk the patronising tone, the invalidating attitudes, the loaded silences, the obvious displeasure – when I didn’t say what was expected.
I’ve endured major anxiety for 5 years, about supposedly calling them the ‘wrong thing’ – because to her ‘that’ was the priority. Not the decades of abuse. To her the terrible thing, was me labelling them wrongly. Continue reading