Healing From Complex Trauma & PTSD/CPTSD

A journey to healing from complex trauma.

I Will Not Try To Trust Anyone Again ~ Lilly Hope Lucario

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trust noone

 

The recent events regarding my ex therapist/doctor, I realise I cannot invest in trusting people to a level of being vulnerable.

The ex therapist/doctor failed so badly to care about my physical health and I realise also about my emotional health. She also once told me that most people will look after their own interests when the shit hits the fan. I realise now she speaking about herself.

She completely prioritised covering her own arse, due to obvious negligence. And I am not giving her the opportunity to lie, gaslight and manipulate the situation into her being the perfect doctor – she likes to believe she is.

I wasted 5 years trying to trust this woman. She knew I had a strong emotional attachment to her and I needed her to be one person in my life who would do what’s right. Who would care about my wellbeing. And now it is blindingly obvious she never did.

It’s devastating.

She was the only person physically in my life I had to trust, to talk to….. and now that’s been ripped from me, in a really cruel way. By betrayal, and the truth of how she didn’t care about me at all, and couldn’t care less whether she hurts me or not. Her reputation and image, are clearly everything to her.

trust noone 2

Lana Del Rey is right. Trust No One

I won’t let this ever happen again.

I will keep people at a very safe distance. And just focus on my children and my dog. They love me and that will have to be enough.

I do know people screw up….. but it is why, and how they deal with it, that matters.  I’ve learned this is key to truly knowing a persons true character.

And I do know some people do have trustworthy people in their lives and I am so thankful they do.

But, that’s not my reality and I know there will be others who are in the same boat.

~ Lilly Hope Lucario

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Author: Healing From Complex Trauma & PTSD/CPTSD

I am a survivor of complex and multiple trauma and abuse, who at the age of 40, began my healing journey. I am using my journey to recovery and healing, to help others, to help survivors feel less alone, validated, encouraged and to enable others to understand themselves more. Complex trauma, particularly from severe, prolonged childhood abuse, is profoundly life changing. Complex trauma produces complex adults. The journey to recovery is a painful, often lonely, emotional daily challenge and it is my aim to encourage others in their daily battle. ~ Lilly Hope Lucario

One thought on “I Will Not Try To Trust Anyone Again ~ Lilly Hope Lucario

  1. I hear ya. My life has been hit with some kind of “plague” of nothing but grim news and bad luck for the past 10 years. I read something one day that keeps my heart protected no matter what – “Do not put all your faith in people, put your faith in Christ”. People are people. I am so close to a nervous breakdown because from the lies and damage people can do. Not that their aren’t good people. You are not alone. Trust me, I am pretty alone right now. You are not alone. He sees you. He knows your pain. Your heart and your soul. And he gets you through the day. Ask Him for help every day. Include His Mother. Good luck.

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