25 Obvious & Non Obvious Self Care Issues – Complex Trauma Survivors Struggle With ~ Lilly Hope Lucario

 

Self care is something spoken about a lot, and seems so very easy. Well, not to complex trauma survivors and in particular childhood complex trauma survivors.

I asked my Facebook community, what were their biggest self care issues, these were some of their responses, which express the obvious self care needs and the not so obvious self care needs, complex trauma survivors struggle with..

Pity, Not Anger ~ Lilly Hope Lucario

 

I am not someone who enjoys feeling anger. I’ve avoided it most of my life. I’m a freeze/fawn traumatology type, not fight. But, over the last few years I’ve had to process needed anger.

At the moment I am processing more intense emotions about ongoing abuse I have endured at the hands of someone with the dark triad traits of psychopathy, narcissism and Machiavellian traits. This person is a heinous human being.

And I have felt intense anger at the abuse I have endured. I have felt hatred, anger, disgust. Rightly so.

But, I refuse to feel anger any longer. Because that hurts me.

 

 

Instead, I will feel pity. Pity for an empty human being, devoid of any good character traits…… who despite being so pathologically selfish, has fucked his own life up, never had good relationships, never felt love, abandoned his child and is a miserable, resentful man.

I’m not going to feel sorry for him.

I’m not going to make excuses for him.

I’m not going to enable, ignore, justify his chosen actions.

He is 100% responsible for everything he has done.

So, I will pity him.

He is so absorbed in believing what he did was what he needed and wanted, he didn’t have anything good.

That’s pitiful.