Something I have realised over the last 5 years of counselling and processing all the severe trauma I have endured…….. is other people’s views and opinions about abusers can be too hard, too painful and too emotional for me to deal with, particularly when I am struggling.
People are not ‘bad’ people for having their own needed views – and I get people need to believe whatever gets them through. And everyone can choose their beliefs and that’s okay. And I believe that people’s different views are okay for each individual person.
But, some beliefs are far too triggering. They often cause more damage and I’ve realised I need strong boundaries.
When we are struggling, it’s necessary to have boundaries and I know I need to stay away from anything that will push me over the edge.
I’ve learned to have my own boundaries and stay away from reading anything on the internet and social media – that will likely provoke an emotional overwhelm and triggers of the past.
I believe in emotional boundaries – our own to take responsibility for what we expose ourselves to….. and to keep away from other people’s views that hurt.
I’ve learned I can manage my triggers when I am really struggling. Not perfectly – but I am much better at this now.
It takes time to learn better boundaries, but it is worth it and so needed.
~ Lilly Hope Lucario
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