Healing From Complex Trauma & PTSD/CPTSD

A journey to healing from complex trauma.


Done with Christianity as an organised religion & done with Christian counselling.

So much has happened over the last 2 years related to so called ‘Christians’ that I know has profoundly affected my healing, caused me more abuse and trauma, and I know I need to just separate myself, from it all.

I have seen so many people who claim to be mature Christians, fail so badly and I find it quite bizarre that they all can’t see it.

I’ve seen lies, excuses, corruption, justifications, minimizing, spiritual abuse in the masses, child abuse and well so much more, but I’ve already blogged enough.

I think so many really are mind controlled, into this concept that it is needed to minimize abuse and protect abuse perpetrators. All with their wrong interpretations of grace, compassion etc.

All this has shown me, is how much these people hurt abuse survivors, abuse them further, spiritually abuse them and re-traumatise them and re-victimise them.

And worse, they truly don’t care. They all stick together.

They truly are the perfect examples of narcissist/sociopaths or their apaths. Continue reading

Alice Miller ‘gets it’ – why society is hell-bent on ‘perpetrator protection.’

Wise and insightful words, I see this everywhere and it really depresses me.

I see it in society, I see it in church people. I even see it in my professional support.

Perp protecting, abuse minimizing, apathy enabling = abuse increasing.

Alice Miller calls this “pandemic” – the protection of the perp”…. just that.

Perpetrator protection.

Alice Miller believes that society has been taught to empathise with the criminal for several reasons, one of the main ones…and rather obvious perhaps is “fear and denial”

This also goes with the whole ‘apath’ pandemic which I also very clearly see occurring.

I should read up more on Alice Miller’s work. I like reading insightful, intelligent, ‘like minded’ people’s work.



People confuse ‘compassion’ for abusers, with being one of their ‘apaths’.

I see people who think they are showing compassion and grace to abusive people, to narcissistic/sociopathic people etc – but what they fail to realise is that they actually courting evil, by becoming one of their ‘apaths’.

I see this, even in people who believe they are wise and spiritually progressed.

I don’t hate abusive people. I don’t want anything bad to occur to them. I do want them stopped from hurting people.

But, I will never condone, enable, excuse, ignore their behaviour. Which is what apaths, so.

It is hard to watch and know there is so little I can do.

Not only are abusive people increasing – but their apath’s, are too.

This is not wisdom, not compassion, not empathy…it is being deceived.

Read here for more info on the Sociopath – Apath – Empath Triad.


Having support, still feels weird. Good, but weird.

So good to have support from my doctor and others, about my intentions to do more about the abusive, narc pastor and her understand my reasons, which are very genuine and appropriate reasons.

And I will do whatever I can legally, which I am finding out more about and I will pursue whatever is legally open to me. I know my heart reasons and I know my faith reasons for this. Wolves in sheep’s clothing should not be pastors. And I don’t want more people hurt by this lying, narcissistic, self serving, wolf. And, I do not care in the slightest what anyone at the church he pastors at thinks about this. I am aware they will wrongly assume all sort of crap. They can go ahead.

My spiritual understanding, my understanding of God, my understanding of Jesus and who He is and my spiritual integrity, is greater than all of them combined. If they choose apathy, If they choose cheap grace, if they choose their needs to remain in their inner circles, if they choose to worship their church and leaders instead of God, if they choose being a narcissist’s apaths – that is their issues. And the shame and all their sin, is theirs too.

Apathy, will never be something I condone.

Using God/Jesus to hurt others, rightly offends my soul greatly.

Support is always needed though and I have this from several people.

Thank you God. I wouldn’t be who I am, without You.


I’m trying hard to avoid politics, but I seriously want to swear at Tony Abbott.

The budget. How very Christian. Who’s affected? The poor, the ill, pensioners, state education etc.

But the politicians had a $70,000 salary increase.

And his daughter has a $70K scholarship for uni – that he could have afforded to pay for, that could have been used instead for someone on low income.

And this current Gov’t want to ‘end the age of entitlement’ – what a joke. These middle class/upper class people can be the most ‘entitled’ of all.

I seriously pray hard that this Gov’t will not get back in, in the next election.

Prior to being PM, Tony whined on and on about Julia Gillard and her broken promise about the carbon tax.

And yet – the narcissistic hypocrite has broken so many of his own pre-election promises. What a liar. It borders sociopathic lying. Premeditated, ego boosting, win at all costs – lying and manipulation.

I HATE politics and see so clearly how the dark triad traits gravitate towards it.

And all the middle/upper class people who think he is doing good work (Tony’s apath minions) – well of course you would, wouldn’t you – because it doesn’t affect you.

You can still afford your posh houses, your private education fees, your private health care, your fancy holidays abroad. Maybe, if you couldn’t afford to go to the doctor, and had to choose between that or buying food – you would think differently.

Narcisissm & bullying epidemic, increasingly abusive & unhealthy society.

We are living in a narcissism epidemic where;

Apathy thrives

Abuse increases

Abusers are enabled

Wisdom decreases

Bullying is rife

Victim blaming increases

Fewer people care

And more and more enjoy it.

So wrong!

I refuse to join in with this sickness. I see it so clearly and I see how unhealthy society is.


Integrity, courage, compassion, lack of apathy……and the haters gonna hate.

Following abuse and bullying occurring, so many abuse and harassment victims coming forward…..someone….now I wonder who….or maybe a minion….decided to set up HATE PAGES – DEDICATED TO ME.

@ https://www.facebook.com/pages/Ban-The-Page-Healing-From-Complex-Trauma-and-Ptsdcptsd/1404916439786511?fref=nf

@ https://twitter.com/HCPTSDTruth

They have been reported. By many.


Considering all the evidence of abuse and the amount of people who have come forward, it really is quite bizarre that anyone would choose to set up Hater Pages….knowing the police are involved too. The Police can access who the admin is for these hater pages.

Spent a few hours collating heaps of info and 3 emails required to send it all over to the UK.

I could write more, but it truly isn’t worth the effort.

But, you know when someone is very insecure and very intimidated by you, when thyey feel the need to set up anonymous hater pages…..so weak and such a pathetic, juvenile action.

I’m glad of my capacity to what’s right, to not have apathy, or egocentricity, and not be intimidated into ignoring harm others are enduing.

I have learned a lot – as I always do.

I can’t even be bothered to write about it….that’s how little it’s bothering me.

Which is good!


APATHY, EGOCENTRICITY, NARCISSISM – Are the most deadly diseases of modern society.

Sadly, most people, have no insight into this.

And even when you inform them, educate them – they don’t want to know and reject it, ignore it, avoid it – which is exactly what they will do – because they have the deadly diseases.

And these diseases, are right throughout society – and Christianity too.


Perfect example today.

“Done nothing to me so I don’t care”.

Truly pathetic and no clue. And proud of it.

Sad. So sad.

My passion changing to reducing abuse. Fight this apathetic society I have to live in.

For the last 12 months, I have assumed I would progress towards being a counsellor, and many more insightful counsellors are needed.

Insight into complex trauma, empathy for others, non apathetic mindset about abusive people and a Christian perspective, is a rare combination.

Christians can often be the most messed up and apathetic of all when it comes to how to deal with abusive people. And often fail miserably helping victims/survivors, with their judgmental, bible bashing, brainwashed, entitled views.

Dear Christians, God you are not.

And may I remind you Christians…..apathy is the opposite of good and is why you allow abuse and evil to continue within your churches.

And don’t even get me started on ‘cheap grace’. This evil is like the backbone of far too much of Christianity. Continue reading