I’m Glad To Have Finally Decided To Create An Ebook – I Can Promote Via All My Platforms ~ Lilly Hope Lucario

I have deliberated over how to publish my book and I’ve settled on an PDF ebook, I can promote via all my social media, this Blog and my Website.

I considered doing it via Amazon, and I see the advantages of it being promoted on a big audience, but I also see the drawbacks other authors have encountered, of dealing with reviews, dealing with trolls leaving bad reviews, when they haven’t even read the book.

I haven’t got time to deal with that crap. I don’t have the time or the motivation, to deal with negative stuff. And I don’t need my book to become a ‘best seller’ – I just want it to reach the people who need it. I just want to know it made a difference for people. And I could always re-publish it again in the future.

My Website has a lot of traffic and I could pay to have the SEO etc increased.

This Blog – has a of traffic.

And that is all enough for me. I know the book will reach those who need it.

SOOOOO glad I have finally made this decision.

Videos Highlighting Many Of My Posters/Memes ~ Lilly Hope Lucario

https://www.facebook.com/pg/HealingFromComplexTraumaAndPTSDAndCPTSD/videos/

Check out the above link, which takes you to slideshows of posters/memes I have created, to help spread awareness, compassion and understanding.

The Narcissist’s Flying Monkeys Are Everywhere ~ Lilly Hope Lucario

Something I have learned in life, is toxic people are everywhere. And their flying monkeys are everywhere too.

Flying monkeys are people who support toxic people. They encourage and condone the toxic persons behaviour. They make excuses for toxic people. Or they ignore the toxic persons bad behaviours and choose to only see what they want to believe is good behaviour. (The ‘good’ behaviour still only being the toxic persons self serving behaviour, as they don’t do anything good – unless it is serving themselves in some way).

Flying monkeys can be family members, friends, church people, co-workers, therapists.

You would think therapists would know better, but they can indeed be flying monkeys when they have a self serving vested interest in condoning the toxic persons behaviour.

Throughout my life, I have seen so many toxic people being supported by flying monkeys.

Both of my husbands, have family who are flying monkeys. They choose to ignore the bad their adult children choose to inflict, and ‘only see the good’. Making excuses for the toxic behaviour and not making their adult children accountable for their bad behaviour. This following on from their poor parenting in the toxic persons childhood. I see clearly how poor parenting – has lead to the child becoming an adult narcissist.

I’ve seen flying monkeys within families, workplaces, groups of friends, churches, therapists rooms. It goes on everywhere.

I’ve seen it happen many times over social media. People who I discerned being toxic, have their flying monkeys who condone the toxic persons behaviour – as long as there is some self serving need being met. They will stay connected to the toxic person – for as long as the toxic person is promoting their work, books etc.

That moment when you desperately want to talk to your former counsellor, but can’t ~ Lilly Hope Lucario

My former counsellor was there through all the abuse I endured from the Baptist cult. She even confirmed in writing that I was spiritually abused – for the formal investigation. Not that it made any difference, the investigation was totally corrupt. As a lot of ‘church’ in-house investigations are.

I just went through a hugely triggering situation. Someone posted the business page of the best friend of the pastor who abused me….. onto my personal Facebook account. Which sent my PTSD mind into a complete panic. It’s when things like this happen you know you still very much have PTSD.

The triggers, the anxiety, the panic, the fear, the thoughts, the emotions, the invasive memories.

PTSD sucks. It really does.

In this state of panic and fear, I immediately wanted to talk to my counsellor. She was my ‘support’ over the last 5 years. She would probably minimize the situation and not really care how distressing this was for me, but she was all I had to talk to when all the church abuse and investigation were going on. And all I had over the years since then.

It’s really sad, when I reflect about all her minimizing about that cult abuse. She never validated how horrible that all was.

It interesting reflecting on how little empathy she had, how she minimized a lot of things – unless I pushed her to confront how bad something is.

I can’t make up my mind whether she is just so desensitised about abuse and heinous abusers………. or truly lacks empathy……… plus only has completely self serving views to do her job………. or whether it is a combination of all of them.

Religiosity, spiritual abuse, cult-like abuse – can cause PTSD & Complex PTSD ~ Lilly Hope Lucario

It should also be noted – right wing, fundamentalist churches – are a perfect place for narcissists, sociopaths and psychopaths to hide out and be welcomed. And this is why there will always be a number of them in every church where abuse is condoned.

These churches are more cult-like – than church-like and they specialise in oppressing victims of abuse and encouraging, protecting and worshipping abusers.

And this is across all denominations and is far more common within all denominations, than is generally known. But more common within right wing, fundamentalist, conservative churches.  It is not just the Catholic Church.

Any church where they encourage hitting children – is abusive.

Any church that suggests the victim was in some way to blame – is abusive.

Any church where they do not hold abusers fully accountable for their actions – is abusive.

Any church where they keep abusers in ministry – is abusive.

Any church where women are oppressed, not allowed to preach, not allowed to work etc – is abusive.

Any church where LGBTIQ people are not welcome – or told this is ‘sinful’ – is abusive.

Discrimination is wrong & causes trauma ~ Lilly Hope Lucario

I really hate discrimination shown and hate projected at the LGBTIQ community and people of colour. It has never made sense to me, how someone being e.g. gay or transgender and/or e.g. black -makes them ‘bad people’. It is totally irrational. Yet there is much hate shown. And it causes a lot of trauma – which is not okay.

Being gay or transgender, or black etc, does not mean someone is a bad person.

My abusers (and there are multiple) – were all white, heterosexual, educated people – who would not have received any discrimination. Yet they were highly abusive, toxic people.

This taught me much about what makes a person bad…. and what doesn’t.

And interestingly, each abuser shows discrimination in some form to others. My step father was racist. The psychopath was racist and hated gay people. The church minister shows hate to the LGBTIQ community – under the guise of ‘religious beliefs’ aka twisting the Bible to show hatred. All this shows to me is their toxic personality disordered issues common in sociopaths, narcissists and psychopaths, that is linked to racism, discrimination and abusive behaviours.