Healing From Complex Trauma & PTSD/CPTSD

A journey to healing from complex trauma.

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I wonder what it’s like to feel ‘safe’.

Feeling safe, is a basic human need. I have never had this.

I’ve never felt safe.

I didn’t feel safe at all, during the first 20 years of my life.

I didn’t feel safe during the next 20 years of my life, which is why I suppressed everything.

Since the age of 40, and having my PTSD breakdown, I have felt very unsafe.

I still feel unsafe, for multiple reasons. PTSD, so anxiety, hyper vigilance etc. Inner child fears. Dissociative stuff, along with suicidal thoughts.

I have never had a feeling of ‘safety’.


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Hierarchy of needs……yeah I am screwed.


In the Maslow based hierarchy of needs, the main ones at the bottom, are the most essential. They are the base upon which a person’s whole life is built upon. They are the basic foundations, every person needs, to lead a secure, happy, joyful life.

When I look at this, I just feel such lack of hope, because my basic needs are not fulfilled. Yes, I have most of the first layer, food, air, water, but even that includes sleep and sleep and I have never been friends.

The next three layers, make me want to cry. I desperately lack these in my life, always have and I know I always will.

Hopelessness, is a truly terrible place to be at.