Narcissists, Sociopaths & Psychopaths And Infidelity ~ Lilly Hope Lucario

Of all the many kinds of abuse that narcissists, sociopaths and psychopaths (I will refer to them as toxic people) choose to inflict on their victims – infidelity is one.

My toxic ex (we are separated) cheated throughout his first marriage and I’ve just been told – cheated throughout ours.

Someone has let me know my ex cheated back before we moved to Australia. I’m not at all surprised. Anyone who can sexually abuse a survivor of severe sexual abuse – is capable of anything.

Infidelity is just one of the many things toxic people do – with no remorse, no conscience, no guilt, no shame, no empathy. And of course – if you confront them – they will act outraged that you would suggest such a thing about them.

My ex has no understanding of love, honesty, decency, care, integrity or anything that is found in decent human beings.

Here are some links:

https://www.psychopathfree.com/articles/why-do-narcissists-and-sociopaths-cheat.374/

https://www.health.com/mind-body/sociopath-traits

https://www.bustle.com/p/13-common-mind-games-sociopaths-play-in-everyday-life-to-watch-out-for-2975623

https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/manipulative-lies-sociopath-personality-rebecca-monet

It’s interesting to recently hear friend’s opinions of my toxic ex. How difficult them found him. How he’s ignorant and shallow. Very boring and weird. And he’ll never change. He will wallow in his darkness and feeling like a victim all his life. 

I am moving forward with my life. I’m raising my boys to be the opposite of their father.

Not Surprised A Member Of The Narcissist Ministers’s Baptist Church – Has Reached Out To Me For Help

Recently a church member – where the abusive narcissist minister resides – reached out to me – as their church is now “fractured”.

Sadly, it doesn’t surprise me in the slightest. A fractured church is exactly what a narcissist minister will have. There will never be peace, or anything healthy – when a narcissist is in charge.

The person who reached out wanted to know what I endured and how those affected can heal.

I wrote back, explaining narcissism, how it’s not treatable, they do not change, it’s all about his ego, he doesn’t know God, his ego and character disturbed issues are his god. I also explained he would need to be ousted – for that church to heal.

In the past – I prayed for discerning people at that church – to work him out. It seems my prayers were answered. I will continue to pray for their wisdom and discernment on how to proceed. It’s not my responsibility any more. I did all I could to stop people getting hurt.

The Baptists church failed to deal with it appropriately and they have now allowed more people to get hurt. That’s on them, and the narcissist minister.

Talking About The Heinous Abuse Caused By People With Personality Disorders – Is Not Increasing Mental Illness Stigma ~ Lilly Hope Lucario

 

Talking about the abuse, suffering and harm caused by people with personality disorders – is NOT increasing ‘mental illness stigma’.

Do not dare to try to silence abuse survivors as this is more abuse.

Personality disorders are not an excuse to abuse people.

I do not promote hate, revenge or retaliation – but I do promote the truth about how heinous their abuse is to endure.

Many victims kill themselves due to their heinous abuse. And some victims are killed by these personality disordered people.

The abuse must be discussed.

And info about these people so victims won’t be targeted again.

You Grieve Narcissists/ Sociopaths/ Psychopaths Twice ~ Lilly Hope Lucario

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This quote of mine is travelling social media with my name having been intentionally removed. It is my quote and so I have written it again. Please feel free to repost 💜 . Grieving a toxic person is very hard – so please have lots of self compassion. – Lilly Hope Lucario 💜💛💙💚💟 . #narcissist #sociopath #psychopath . #ComplexPTSD #Complextrauma #CPTSD #PTSD #childabuse #abuse #lillyhopelucario #healingfromcomplextraumaandptsd . See my bio for the link to my website and there is the link to my award winning blog.

A post shared by Lilly Hope Lucario (@healingcomplextraumaptsd) on Aug 3, 2017 at 3:05pm PDT

Reactive Abuse – Another Form Of Toxic Manipulation ~ Lilly Hope Lucario

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This is another form of toxic manipulation from abusers such as #narcissist #sociopath #psychopath It is deliberate and intentional. . #ComplexPTSD #Complextrauma #childabuse #abuse #PTSD #CPTSD #healing #lillyhopelucario #healingfromcomplextraumaandptsd . See my bio for the link to my website and there is the link to my award winning blog.

A post shared by Lilly Hope Lucario (@healingcomplextraumaptsd) on Jul 30, 2017 at 3:47pm PDT

When Narcissists Try To Claim They Have Complex PTSD = Perpetuate Their Delusional Thinking

NPD and Complex PTSD are entirely different.

For a start CPTSD is NOT about grandiose, delusional thinking – which is a hallmark trait of NPD ……… yet narcissists will conveniently forget that.

Narcissists have a DEFICIT of empathy – another hallmark trait of NPD……. yet those with Complex PTSD are not deficit in empathy and many – like myself – have considerable empathy.

Narcissists are devious, pathological liars…….. those with Complex PTSD are not.

The list goes on.

Sure some trauma survivors have the ‘fight’ traumatology symptom, which is narcissism, but it is about far more than just that one issue. But, I have seen narcissists focus only on that to delude themselves, conveniently ignoring all the other diagnostic criterion.

Narcissists will believe anything to avoid dealing with their true self. Including delude themselves they have Complex PTSD, which is sad – because they continue to be dishonest and will not heal. Which is not what I want for them.

I wish narcissists would face their issues – for themselves and all they harm. Because unlike narcissists, I actually do have an appropriate level of empathy for everyone.

No You’re Not An Empath, INFJ or HSP. You’re A Narcissist

I will be writing a blog in this soon, because this is something I see occurring all too often. Narcissists are delusional about themselves, and will do anything to justify their ‘oversensitivity’ – which is in fact narcissistic sensitivity. Not empathic sensitivity.

You Know You Are Healing From Complex Trauma – When You Don’t Internalise Toxic People’s Darkness ~ Lilly Hope Lucario

This toxic person – decided trolling a woman who has suffered so greatly, and then is grieving the death of her abusive mother – was the person to troll, abuse and harass. Which is a pretty disgusting thing for someone to do. But, that’s sadly how vile some people choose to be.

I always reflect on these situations – as to how I dealt with it and I am pleased with myself. I did not get remotely upset. I did not feel hurt or angry.

I just stepped back, looked at the actions of this toxic person, and placed the appropriate boundaries. I did not respond to her many emails. I did not react back. I’ve learned that toxic people don’t respond well to being told their actions are abusive.

And this is indeed – healing.

I no longer internalise toxic people’s darkness. That’s their shit to deal with.

My Narcissistic & Dysfunctional In-laws Are Finally Going To Hear The Truth ~ Lilly Hope Lucario

My husband comes from a very narcissistic and dysfunctional family. None of them have any insight into that, and they truly believe they are normal and do no wrong. That is far from the truth.

My husband is highly narcissistic, his sister is a drug addict, his parents are selfish to the core and none of them have any conscience, remorse or shame about anything they do to harm others.

This has all been confirmed in counselling.

Fortunately for me and my children, all of my husbands family live the other side of the world. So we only see them when they come for a holiday.

My in-laws are here now, for a 3 week holiday. Today, is the first day we see them.

Due to counselling and confirming my husbands issues, and the way I have been treated by him and his parents, I am no longer tolerating their dysfunction, or narcissism.

Now, I am confronting it. His parents will be told their son is personality disordered, his personality did not form in a healthy way in his childhood and teenage years. They will be told their son is selfish, a pathological liar, an adulterer, emotionally abusive and never learned to own his wrong behaviours and never learned to have remorse or a conscience. And that this has all been confirmed in counselling. And depending on the way the conversations goes, I will also tell them their daughter is a drug addict.

They won’t like this, but that is their issue to deal with.  I am no longer placating toxic people and no longer enabling them.