Healing From Complex Trauma & PTSD/CPTSD

A journey to healing from complex trauma.

It’s Necessary For Complex Trauma Survivors – To Understand They Do Not Need To Tolerate Any Form Of Abuse ~ Lilly Hope Lucario

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So glad I found the IP blacklist – where you add IP addresses of trolls

I’ve had a lot of trolling, abusive comments and issues from abusive people, on this blog over the time I have been blogging here.

I’ve had paedophiles, sociopaths, narcissists – all troll my blog.

I’ve had abusive people I’ve banned on social media – troll and abuse me here on this blog.

And I’ve dealt with them all, mostly by completely ignoring them.

Now, I have found the place where you can add IP addresses of trolls – so they are blocked. I wish I had found this earlier, but better late than never.

This is the latest one blocked – some troll in Bucharest – venting and trolling for fun. Such narcissistic and sociopathic behaviour. Her ‘screen’ name is Kati Lomer (doubt that is her real name). Her IP address: I also have her email address, used to comment on this site.  Continue reading

I love that I can ignore BS comments, here on WordPress :)

WordPress, have a great function, where you can select which comments are approved.

And thank God, because there are some shitty human beings in this world, who feel so entitled to say some very nasty, irrational, invalidating, victim shaming, abuser protecting/enabling….. BS.

And of course, the downright sociopathic trolls, who don’t like seeing the truth revealed and need to vomit their darkness……. from the safety of their keyboard.

And I can ignore them all on here! Yay!

Thank you WordPress! 🙂

I love the security/safety features of this blog.




Proof, that sociopaths are intentional & proud of who they are.

Too many people choose to believe toxic, personality disordered people, ‘don’t understand what they are’. And would choose to be different. Sorry, but in my experience of too many of them…….. they enjoy being what they are.

This is proof of a ‘proud sociopath’. Who did not have a bad childhood.

Some people…. are just evil.

Fullscreen capture 27042016 75655 AM

He goes on to condescend about my faith, condescend about me being an empathic person, condescend about me having a conscience. Whilst accusing me of being condescending, because I try to wonder if they had childhood trauma (empathy).

Sociopaths, are cold blooded people, who are also hypocrites.

Sociopaths also enjoy trolling…….. looking for empathic people, to vent their darkness onto.

Darkness, hates the light and will always try to destroy the light.

But, I will keep being a light anyway.

Because light is stronger, than darkness.

Continue reading

Didn’t take long for the trolls to start being abusive about suicide.

Comments on social media – particularly Twitter have now descended further, to outright attacks about people being embarrassing, attention seeking, weak etc.

I knew this would happen, because I know what humanity is like – far too many selfish, lacking in empathy, abusive, coming out to play in their social media playground, looking for ways to vomit their own darkness, to bring others down.

Kicking those vulnerable, while they are already on their knees.

I’ve being advising people repeatedly to avoid media, avoid social media if the current content due to Robin Williams suicide, is affecting them emotionally.

I can see people reacting to provocation – in a highly emotional state. I can see people deliberately winding depressed people up – eg saying suicide is ’embarrassing’ and then when they’ve provoked a reaction – calling the one they have provoked and upset – the bullies.

Typical narcissistic, bullying actions – I’ve seen happening often through my life. I haven’t reacted and just left it alone. I’ve wanted to jump in and defend the person provoked – my protective side of me wanting to help, but I am too fragile to handle it myself right now. Continue reading

Is it a full moon? Seems like all the trolls are out to hunt and prey.

Dealing with trolls on social media is something I am so used to now.

They hunt….

They appear….

They vomit their darkness….

They spew their issues…

They defecate their abuse onto people….

They revel in their darkness…

Continue reading


Backed up Hetty Johnson, and got told by an abusive person ‘piss of you condescending cunt’.

Hetty Johnson, who I admire and does vital work in child protection, made a comment on Twitter that was misinterpreted by someone. I also noticed she gets criticised for her work, which is typical of many in society who like to put down those who step up and do good.

So, I politely explained this person misinterpreted what Hetty had stated and got told to ‘piss off you condescending cunt’. And then this person deleted the comment, but I had already reported it.

He also says calls himself ‘Mr Wonderful’ and is abusive in other posts. Clearly narcissistic – delusions of grandeur, explosive, abusive, nasty, weak.

It had made me aware that many people will criticise others, who do good. People seem to hate those who act with courage and integrity and will find anything they can to put them down, minimize the good they do.

I realise by being on social media, I am open to being abused. But, I don’t intend to allow these abusive people to put me off.

Courage, strength, integrity….things you would think people would support.

But, often people with these qualities, get attacked.


Abusive people, have one set of rules for them, and another for their victims.

Positive Action For PTSD UK continue on their hate and lies, allowing others to believe their lies.

As is typical with abusive people – they have one set of rules for themselves and one for their victims.

They can abuse and lie all they like…..but the victims cannot defend themselves or speak the truth. And if you do speak the truth – then they turn themselves into the victims.

Perfect example;

I found this on Twitter..

So I politely stated that this was further bullying and it was being reported. No bad language, but I did defend myself and explain this was cyberbullying, as it is lies.

And then this appeared – and the woman is calling me a C***.

Simon Buckden, is clearly enticing more people to report. Again based upon his lies and his needs to cyber bully anyone who he doesn’t like.

An update on this post…

Since the admins who were previously working with Simon Buckden – at that time – have found out the truth themselves …….. and that everything that I stated and warned people about, was correct about Mr Buckden…… I did receive a genuine apology and it is now understood between us – that I was indeed trying to protect people and this was with good heart intentions and this former admin and I are now friendly.

Whilst I am sad that whole situation had to occur at all……. I know people have learned from this…… learned that they should not bully people online that they do not even know….. or trust people like Simon Buckden – who is being investigated and has been charged with fraud.

My intentions were good and to help others…… and I was secure in that then…… and I still am.

I received a lot of abuse and hassle, due to that whole horrible situation, but I am still thankful I endured it, as people learned from it.

I will always be someone who defends people who are being lied to and duped by sociopaths/psychopaths….. because there needs to be people with the integrity and compassion required……. to stand up to them, for the wellbeing of others.


Started researching why social media is damaging society & health. Wow!

Yes, it is.

Wow, there is so much info from psychologists, human science experts, and the like on how social media is causing more damage to society, than any good it may do.

I am not going to deny this to myself, or be a hypocrite, or pretend and excuse with I feel it is okay.

I just can’t be someone with apathy, someone who can make justifications and excuses to turn something into what I want to hear.

I just can’t.

Social media is increasing many harmful behaviours, damaging people’s psyche’s, causing ridiculous amounts of bullying and narcissism, hindering social skills, hindering education, encourages oversharing, damaging memory, social skills, hindering people getting out and having real interactions, increasing anti-social personalities, anger, aggression, increasing a whole mass of uneducated and unwise opinions and advice, flushing away what used to be genuine emotions and interactions and so much more.


That is a whole lotta bad influence and harm.

Scary, actually.


Suicide is very real, should not be ignored, or dismissed as weakness, or selfishness.


It is very upsetting, to see how much of the general public’s reaction, to the recent suicide of Charlotte Dawson, has been so negative, re-traumatizing, shame inducing, lacking any empathy, condemning, deeply hurtful and completely wrong.

All based upon lack of education, biased opinions, lack of empathy and so many people believe they are entitled to have an opinion, about something they haven’t experienced.

Just what I have seen on the news alone on the internet, is bad enough. I am glad I am not on social media, because I would be deeply upset to see more of these horrible reactions, particularly if it was anyone I knew.

I was thankful, to see this, which highlights, how a strong, mature, intelligent woman, can become suicidal, due to PTSD from childhood abuse. Tracie O’Keefe is very brave to speak up publicly about her own battles with suicide, and I thank her for that. As well as all her work as a therapist, to help people down off that ledge.


Having done so much research, been suicidal myself many times, I am very aware of how it feels to get to the point, where life becomes too painful, to endure. Continue reading