I felt compelled to create this poster, with the wise words complex trauma survivors, need to hear, from Pete Walker.
This is especially needed, due to the abusive, unhealthy opinions spouted by Stephen Fry recently.
I’ve been a huge promoter of Pete Walker’s work. He is a very important part of my healing journey. He is aware of my website, my work and he encourages this and gave me his permission to use his work, which is so very kind of him.
I emailed him, to check if it is okay with him, for my to quote his work in my book, and he agreed and gave encouragement for my book too!
And he thanked me for promoting his work. For me, is an honour to promote his work.
So so so so thankful to him!!
Pete Walker, has deep insight into complex trauma within childhood.
Emotional flashbacks, are something many don’t realise they are enduring, until they understand what they are, why they are occurring and learn how to identify them.
They are the hardest flashbacks to understand and identify, and many just assume they are feeling emotional. Often they will be described by others, as being over-emotional, or over sensitive.
I am still struggling with mine. But, I am aware, when I feel scared, vulnerable, fearful, lost, completely alone…I am experiencing not just what may have hurt me now, but the issue has triggered emotions from the past too. I know my inner child is suffering. Continue reading →
Over the course of a therapy, I often reframe emotional flashbacks as messages from the wounded inner child designed to challenge denial or minimization about childhood trauma. It is as if the inner child is clamoring for validation of past parental abuse and neglect: “See this is how bad it was–how overwhelmed, terrified, ashamed and abandoned I felt so much of the time.” When seen in this light, emotional flashbacks are also signals from the wounded child that many of her developmental needs have not been met. Most important among these are the needs for safety and for Winnicottian ‘good enough’ attachment.
There are no needs more important than those of a parent’s protection and empathy, without which a child cannot own and develop her instincts for self-protection and self-compassion—the cornerstones of a healthy ego. Without awakening to the need for this kind of primal self-advocacy, clients remain stuck in learned self-abandonment and rarely develop effective resistance to internal or external abuse, and seldom gain the motivation to consistently use the 13 tools for managing emotional flashbacks at the end of this article.
I believe this type of dissociation also accounts for the recurring disappearance of previously established trust that commonly occurs with emotional flashbacks. This phenomenon makes it imperative that we psychoeducate clients that flashbacks can cause them to forget that proven allies are in fact still reliable, and that they are flashing back to their childhoods when no one was trustworthy. Continue reading →