Healing From Complex Trauma & PTSD/CPTSD

A journey to healing from complex trauma.


Songs for when I’m having emotional flashbacks.

I’ve learned to go with my emotions, emotional flashbacks. Rather than suppress them. I also know to not stay there long. But, it helps to just feel it. My past has made me who I am, and I honour each part of my journey. Rather than feel ashamed of it.

This song reminds me of being 16.


This song reminds me of my hurt inner child. And how I feel right now.



My song, when I feel vulnerable, scared, small and needy.


So many people say vulnerability, feeling scared, feeling fragile are all so wrong.

Well, in society terms I am a failure, weak and pathetic.

But, I am honest.

And this is how I feel, increasingly.

Or maybe, not increasingly, but I just acknowledge it more.

I feel it a lot. I feel unsafe.

I have most of my life.

Beautiful song – Don’t Bring Me Down ~ Sia


Don’t Bring Me Down ~ Sia

Faint light of dawn
I’m listening to you
Breathing in and breathing out
Needing nothing

You’re honey dipped
You are beautiful
Floating clouds, soft world
I can’t feel my lips

I’m going down
I don’t want to change
I’m going down
Going down the drain

Don’t bring me down
I beg you
Don’t bring me down
I won’t let you
Don’t bring me down Continue reading

Sia and Howard Stern interview. Made me cry.

I love how honest and real Sia is. She has also stated on Twitter, she had Bipolar 2 and PTSD.

I teared up when listening to her in tears about Howard Stern talking about her wanting to end her life, and calling her a diamond in the sky now shining and saying she is special.

I relate to her, even though we have very different lives. I didn’t know she had a bad childhood, but I suspected it. There is so much about how real and raw she is that I relate to deeply.

Many in society will say Sia doesn’t have the right ‘society boundaries’ – as I have also been accused of.

But, you know, I would rather have someone like Sia as a friend, who is real, honest and says it exactly as it is, than someone who holds back, presents a mask and I know they are not upfront about who they really are.

I love how real she is. Even if she say things that will shock others. She doesn’t shock me. I find it very refreshing to hear someone so honest about herself, good and bad. Takes courage.

Sia – Eye of the Needle

“Eye Of The Needle”

Take me down
I’m feeling now
And if I move on
I admit you’re gone
And I ain’t ready
But I’ll hold steady
Yeah I’ll hold you
In my arms, in my arms
In my arms

And you’re locked inside my heart
And your melody’s an art
And I won’t let the terror in I’m stealing time
Through the eye of the needle

Step and repeat
Tears fall to the beat
Smile through the pain
Feel the acid rain
And I ain’t ready
But I’ll hold steady
Yeah I’ll hold you
In my arms, in my arms
In my arms
Continue reading