I’ve been very quiet on this blog – for several reasons. It’s been a very hard 6 months and I’m still dealing with the trauma every day.
I’ve been diagnosed with Vaso Vagal Nerve Damage – caused by extreme distress – as per a cardiologist. The cardiologist knows my history and stated the domestic violence I have endured for the last 18 years – is the cause of this untreatable, irreversible nerve damage – which causes me to have orthostatic hypotension and I am unable to work. I am disabled.
My health was fine when I met my husband 18 years ago. I was working and could exercise hard. The slow insidious abuse inflicted by my husband being a sociopath and sex abuser – destroyed my health. It is the reason for my PTSD breakdown 6 years ago.
Through counselling (which my counsellor admits she has made big mistakes in at times) – I have had to understand my husband is a narcissistic sociopath – no conscience, no remorse, no guilt, no shame, exploitative, overwhelmingly selfish, pathological liar, enjoys hurting people, enjoys seeing people hurt and upset (even children) and enjoyed coercing a sexual abuse survivor – into unwanted sex.
My counsellor arranged for him to have counselling with a psychologist who specialises in sex offenders/abusers. But, before the psychologist was able to start dealing with his sex abuser issues – my husband quit counselling. She has stated what he did was sexual abuse and rape.