Healing From Complex Trauma & PTSD/CPTSD

A journey to healing from complex trauma.

Interesting to see someone else state Cardinal Pell is sociopathic & everything else I already knew.

Just watched 60 minutes and the man personally appointed by the Pope to deal with child sexual abuse within the Catholic Church…. and hear him say exactly what I have already worked out….

He described Pell as sociopathic, lacking in any empathy, or conscience, a known and proven liar, capable of showing absolutely no remorse, lie effortlessly etc and treat abuse victims in a completely disgusting (sociopathic) way. And clearly Pell knew of abuse by priests and supported them and enabled them.

I agree with this man appointed by Pope Francis, state Pell should be facing legal action/consequences and needs removing from any position of authority immediately, by the Pope. And if the Pope has any balls and conscience, he will. Continue reading

Belle Gibson – typical narcissistic psychopath type – pathological lying, exploitative, no remorse, no empathy, no guilt, acting the victim.

Belle Gibson intentionally exploited many. And she intentionally exploited vulnerable people – those battling cancer. That is despicable.

She lied about everything. Then when exposed for the liar she is, tried to blame a ‘bad childhood’. But, her mother has confirmed, this is more lies too. Which does not surprise me at all. And I am far more inclined to believe her mother, when Belle is already proven to be a pathological liar, with no empathy, or remorse.


She meets many criteria for a narcissist, sociopath, psychopath. And even described herself as a psychopath once.

Millions fell for all her lies. All her exploiting. They are the true victims, not Belle Gibson.

I see posts about her, and some people have misplaced compassion, want to make excuses for her, want to focus far more on her issues and want to believe more of her lies, being groomed further by the predatory/manipulative behaviours she has already duped many with. These people don’t realise they are being groomed and duped too. Continue reading


Counselling tomorrow, and dreading it. I am meant to talk about my mother.

I don’t want to talk about my ‘mother’.

She wasn’t a mother.

Mother’s don’t set you up to abused by paedophiles.

Mothers don’t abuse you every day of your childhood.

Mothers don’t shame you and abuse you more by saying you are a drama queen when you try to end your life as a teenager. Suicidal due to so much abuse, sexual abuse and severe depression.

Mothers don’t throw you out on the street in the freezing cold, when you are having a miscarriage and not speak to you for months – not even caring whether you lost the baby or not.

I could on with her list of abuse, but I would be here all night.

What is there to talk about? Continue reading

Are some who defend abusive disordered people, in fact abusive disordered people themselves?

People make excuses for abusive people for a variety of reasons… which I have blogged about previously.

Now I am starting to see that some might be defending abusive people – like narcissists, sociopaths, because maybe they know deep down, they have the traits too.

Disordered people often don’t want to admit that is what they are – especially when those disordered traits are abusive and wrong.

Maybe some of the people defending abusive disordered people – subconsciously recognise the traits within themselves – and so immediately go on the defensive and defend abusive people……… which is actually not about having compassion for others….. it is about protecting their own selves and their own issues, so they don’t have to have self honesty and delve within, into their own darkness.

It’s easier to believe they are a decent person, rather than accept their own narcissism, their own sociopathic traits etc……. if you can make excuses for them, in others.

And of course, it is easy to then label this behaviour with the delusion, of ‘compassion’.


They are out to cause damage to others… not everyone, just those they prey on….

shit and piss

And they can do this in highly covert, manipulative ways…… lying, gas-lighting, minimizing, excusing, projecting, justifying, blaming ….. the list is so long.

Many won’t realise this is what they are doing, due to how covert the behaviour is.


Learning about, and educating others about narcissists, sociopaths and psychopaths…is needed. So do not ‘shame’ me for it.

People can make the very wrong assumption and judgment, that because I educate and post about narcissists, sociopaths and psychopaths……that I am just bitter, unforgiving and judging them.

I’ve had people say to me they think it is wrong that I post about people who abuse …and shame me for this.

If I hadn’t chosen to educate myself about people who cause abuse and harm……..I wouldn’t have learned what happened to me…..I wouldn’t have learned that it was 100% wrong and 100% the responsibility of the person causing the abuse.

Describing someone who is clearly a fully diagnosable psychopath, or narcissist etc – as exactly that…….isn’t wrong or judgment…..it is stating the truth and those who are at that end of the continuum, are always that person…..they aren’t e.g. a  non psychopath sometimes, and then a psychopath other times…….that is s very immature attitude to believe.

I don’t describe everyone who has hurt me, as a fully diagnosable ‘insert personality disorder’.

But the ones I know were/are…..I will.

And the others as sociopathic….narcissistic.

That is not labelling…….it is a fact.

It is their personality that is so deeply entrenched within them, along with a lack of empathy, lack of conscience, lack of remorse, lack of willingness to be anything else……that it consumes their entire being, and every action, every thought, every behaviour.

When they are appearing to be decent, or kind…..it is fake, non genuine and only for manipulative and self serving needs……and this façade and fake persona they can easily adopt……even fools many mental health professionals.

I don’t encourage hatred, or retaliation, revenge, wishing bad on others….at all.

By learning all I have myself…….and I didn’t lean any of this in counselling…….I learned it all by my own education of myself about psychology…..

I have been able to start to deal with the deeper aspects of the damage they made decisions to cause.

Like why I was the family scapegoat.

Why my mother allowed me to be abused.

Why no-one cared about the abuse.

Why I had certain behaviours…….to survive all this abuse.

Why they can’t own what they have done….so to not hold out hope they will.

Why none of what happened was my shame, guilt or blame……but why they projected all their shame, guilt and blame onto me and how to start healing those wounds.

Why so many people are duped by these master manipulators/liars.

Why society knows little about all this and so victims get little support.

I know you cannot heal unless you know all this, so I am thankful I can take the more courageous road of learning, educating myself, and dealing with it all, no matter how painful…

And in sharing my journey, I have helped 1000’s of others in their journey too.

There’s not many Christians out there willing to open about abuse and who causes it and why………they get hung up on this false belief that we must not say anything ‘bad’ about people…….because we are all sinners.

But, it is very much needed to educate self and others about all this.

I don’t take the more comfortable path many church people will take and ignore most of it and just ‘forgive’ and show cheap grace.

I have had people criticise me for this and suggest that no contact with my mother etc is wrong.

Well, I don’t live in denial or a positive illusion If they need to have that, it is their own self serving issues.

But I will tell then they are very wrong and unwise,..to suggest what I do, is not okay, or needed.

I remind people…….the truth is what sets you free.

Not denial, or minimizing the harm some cause, or pretending they are nice/decent when they aren’t.

Education is needed and if you shame people, for becoming educated and embracing truth..with all the deep courage required for this……………then I suggest you take a good look inside your own heart and soul.


Some Christian psychologists, recognise the affects of sociopaths/narcissists & are willing to use correct terminology


It is helpful to see some Christians, recognise the affects of the trauma caused by narcissists, sociopaths, psychopaths and are willing to use the correct psychiatric terminology to describe them.

And recognise the need for boundaries and no contact.

None of this ‘you must stay and help them’, ‘you must have reconciliation’, you must ignore their abuse – we are all sinners BS.

I also was thankful for the clarification………that NO God won’t change them……..unless they ‘want’ to be changed……and guess what……..they don’t want to change, because they don’t think they do anything wrong……they are incapable of change…..and she has never seen any of them change.

I already knew this. God doesn’t take away free will. So, how can they be changed when they don’t think there is anything wrong with them.

1 Comment

Why I try to help educate others…..


I tried to explain in counselling, why I choose to attempt to educate people about the traits within abusive people, that harm others.

I do this, because I know education is needed and is the only way to help reduce abuse….and not just re-actively deal with victims and mental health issues, afterwards.

I think many counsellors, and those in the mental health arena, do just focus on dealing with re-active work. It’s like they come to an acceptance and apathetic state of knowing harm occurs, and just deal with the victims afterwards. And don’t want to talk about ‘bad’ people, especially if they are Christians and just seem to want to accept people for what they are, no matter how much harm they cause others.

I don’t want to become that person.

Yes, I want to help victims/survivors of abuse, but I want to also try to help educate people, so they can be hurt less. Pro-active work, as well.

Because, I know the effects of such devastating harm/abuse. And I had no-one ever to step in and let me know what was going on. No-one.

Because I had no-one say to me my mother is a narcissist/sociopathic person, so I suffered for decades.

Because I had no-one tell me that sexual abused children, often go on to harm themselves more, by being drawn to more narcissistic/sociopathic people, so I got hurt more.

No-one educated me, or helped me,

or let me know what was really going on.

So, I got harmed, abused and suffered,

repeatedly, over 4 decades,

and it is devastating.

And now I am having to deal with

it all, re-actively. 

I so wish someone had helped me,

much earlier.

Continue reading

Found out today, about more corruption going on in a church.

I won’t say where and who is involved, but this doesn’t surprise me and I had already sensed this may occur.

Spiritual abuse and bullying (narcissism/sociopathy), goes on more within churches more than most church people want to admit.

It’s obvious to me as well, that where there are people who are not blind to this darkness….there will be more abuse occurring,  to get them out. Satan works harder against those who will call out the darkness in others.

And there will be all those blind to the truth, blind to what is obviously occurring….all going along with it, or ignoring/avoiding it. All enabling this darkness to continue and increase, but they won’t admit that to themselves, or accept what they do is wrong. Their need to continue their actions, paramount above truth and goodness. Cheap grace often used and is a terrible darkness running throughout churches worldwide.

People always do what they need to do. Believe what they want to believe. Churches are full of such people.

Many victims of abuse occur as a result, and they are just forced out, and the abusers raised up as a result. All completely the opposite of what Jesus modelled.

It’s truly terrible.

I can’t think of anywhere worse to be right now, than at the G20.

All those psychopathic and narcissistic politicians and world leaders….all congregated in one contained area.


I would rather go clean public toilets.

Obama, Abbott and many more, have all been identified by many psychologists, as having very high levels of psychopath/narcissistic traits. Most politicians do. It goes with the territory And anyone with any psychology understanding and insight into humanity, and discernment will know and see this.

But, so many people don’t know this…and it is always interesting to watch who is drawn to them. People who are fascinated with their power and glory, people with similar traits – identifying with these world leaders.

*shudders more.

It certainly helps validate my suspicions about certain people. People I can see so clearly have no self insight into who they truly are inside and what their real motivations in life, are. No awareness of how egocentric, egotistic, and ‘all about me’ – they are. Pretend to be helping others (like politicians do) – but really it is all about themselves, their glory, their success, their desire to be in the limelight.

I can always spot these types. My narc/sociopath/psychopath radar is well skilled.

People’s red flags I can spot, often become validated as my discernment watches them over time.