Healing From Complex Trauma & PTSD/CPTSD

A journey to healing from complex trauma.


It’s a great morning, when your first messages, are amazing support from another pyschologist!

I have a lot of support from professionals in the trauma and PTSD field, and I am always so deeply thankful!

I logged on this morning and these were the first messages I read ūüôā

Dr Fee, is a psychologist and deals specifically with anxiety and trauma related issues.

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Thankful for the support I receive, challenging popular and unwise thinking.

I am aware of the support I receive, including mental health professionals. And truly thankful. It helps me know I am on the right track. Which is important in a world, where so much bad advice is being given, that leads to more harm.

To have recognition and support from many mental health professionals, does make a difference. Especially when the support is offered for the posts I write that challenge the mass thinking society seems to follow along with.

It takes courage and integrity to challenge mass thinking. But, I do. Because I see the harm, the deeper issues and the bigger picture.

My integrity means I cannot agree with, condone or encourage unhealthy and harmful views and opinions.

So, I walk a walk in the opposite direction of many, and that’s okay.

People with integrity, depth of thought, empathy, often do. Continue reading


Reminding myself, there is no point in expectation of someone who lacks capacity for empathy.

When dealing with a journey with so much abuse and trauma, it is normal and appropriate to want those closest to us, to care about what we have endured. And offer kind words, when we need them. When they don’t, it’s hurtful (again normal emotions) and perpetuates the lifelong issues, of those we love not having any compassion or empathy, when we truly needed them to.

So, when dealing with people who clearly lack empathy (even if they don’t realise it), it is helpful to remember, not to expect empathy from someone who lacks capacity for it. Some people are very limited in their ability to see other people’s pain, have any empathy and it is always healthier, to not expect anything from them. Some people can’t even offer sympathy. And some turn every conversation, into being about themselves.

Expectation, of emotionally/EQ limited people, is a futile and emotional waste of time. That can, if you allow it, cause a lot of hurt. Because, they truly do not care. For whatever reason. Continue reading

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I have been asked a few times if I get paid to do my work. No, I don’t.

When I tell people I run a website, blog, social media¬†etc, I get asked if I get paid for this. And asked why I bother, if it doesn’t earn me an income. No, I don’t get paid, at all. And I don’t do it for money. I do it because it’s needed, even though it can be unpleasant, emotional and challenging.

Like many out there who volunteer and work unpaid, I do it because people need help. People are struggling, need support, need education, need someone out there providing info that shows they ‘get it’, need compassion.¬†I only aim to help with this in the small way I can. We can only make little ripples, only help a few or even one at a time, and that is all that is needed. Continue reading

Added a slideshow of professionals I recommend & value, to my website.

I truly value the amazing work of many mental health professionals and clinicians. I also truly value the support & encouragement they offer me continually.

So, I have added a slideshow of their websites, to further promote their work. This will continue to be updated and many more added.


Another blog shared by a mental health professional, as a main feature!

I am so thankful for all the support I receive from mental health professionals, all around the world. It still always comes as a surprise and I am so grateful.

Another blog today, was shared as a main feature.

http://paper.li/ValeskaCosci?edition_id=55dbc1e0-683c-11e5-bdc8-0cc47a0d1609 …..¬†01/10/15

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Knowing I am making a difference for trauma survivors, keeps me motivated.

When my work, insight and sharing has an impact on those in positions of influence, who are highly educated and do considerable work within the mental health field… I know I am making a difference.

I recently had email exchanges with Prof. David Susman Ph.D – who has an impressive biography you can see at http://davidsusman.com/about/

The conversation was about ‘shaming’ within the mental health industry. At first David rejected my insight and views, then he emailed me with an apology and stated my views are accurate and he agrees with them.

These are some of the comments he stated…

“I believe your website and advocacy is very important”

“I would like to offer my apologies to you for my comments. I value your perspectives and certainly see your point of view.”

“I’m so appreciative of your insights and comments. I really agree with everything you said.”

“Your points about shame are also very accurate. I have seen many people withdraw and avoid others because of this. The fear and anxiety is tremendous.”

“Once again, I’m so sorry for my unfeeling comments. I have definitely learned a valuable lesson from our exchange and I won’t be so assertive in the future in insisting that “one size fits all” for therapy and recovery.”

I am thankful for these comments and feedback about my work and my insight.

I am thankful to be able to converse with highly educated people within the mental health industry and actually make a difference. Continue reading

Support from professionals, and great timing too.

I’ve had an amazing review (which made me cry) today from a trauma therapist/complex trauma survivor, and a Ph.D psychologist also contact me stating she will provide a review.

Plus¬†I noticed several mental health professionals sharing my posts today.¬†Posts about the deeper realities of this journey, deeper insight, the issues¬† I see within the mental health profession etc. Posts that are not always the popular opinion, but are more honest. And I’ve had that honesty validated.

I am blessed to have this support. And I am so appreciative and thankful for it. It helps me to know I am on the right track and affirms my insight, and helps others know my work is valuable and shared by professionals. Continue reading

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It is wonderful to see all the many amazing professionals, clinicians, advocates for mental health, abuse, child abuse.

Dealing with so much pain, grieving, fear, and processing of my severe trauma past, means I am prone to fixating on the darker sides of life and those who cause it, and not finding/seeing that balance of the all the good that so many in this world Рare doing.

I’m not going to ‘beat myself up’ about my deeper awareness of the darker sides of humanity, because there are profound reasons. Reasons you don’t just ‘get over’. And grieving trauma to the severity I have endured, is very painful.

But, I do try to see all the many good people, the many working hard, with empathy and compassion, all collectively helping many and doing such needed work.

Continue reading